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Shame on… who?
Shame is that feeling you get when you realize you’ve violated the norms of your community. But it only works when it comes from your...
Jul 25, 20232 min read
‘Because they don’t know you…’
“Hurt people hurt people.” It’s a lovely bit of rhetoric that happens to say something profound. To quote my new friend Erin Jones on a...
Jun 8, 20232 min read
Do you trust me?
In my work I think a lot about the relationship between truth and trust. How you need trust to get to truth. Especially the kinds of deep...
May 25, 20232 min read
Ask a thousand questions
In my house we are *obsessed* with the soundtrack to Roald Dahl’s Matilda the Musical. Especially “School Song,” a clever track that...
Mar 26, 20232 min read
Oh the places you’ll go
My eyes lingered on a short, quick tweet awhile before I realized it was one of the most delightfully curious compliments I’d ever seen. ...
Mar 13, 20232 min read
We’re so much better than condescension
A conservative friend of mine — let’s call her Jen — just attended one of those dialogue-rich events in a major city with a liberal...
Mar 1, 20232 min read
‘What do you mean by that?’ to the rescue
It started with a question. A man named Alan turned to a woman named Jamie — both of them locals in Edmonds, Washington, who’d signed up...
Jan 30, 20232 min read
The power of people's places
There’s always a bit of awkwardness when you walk into a friend’s home for the first time, a tension I find myself defusing by looking...
Jan 6, 20232 min read
Give the gift of your interest
Ever notice something in you jump in shock when somebody you’re listening closely to says something you really don’t like? That’s what...
Dec 12, 20222 min read
That time I was judgy to judgments
As I packed up from one of my curiosity workshops this summer, a participant named Don came up to me. He was thrilled about what he’d...
Nov 24, 20222 min read
Vote NO on election assumptions
“Don’t assume that what you voted against is what they voted for.” When I read that tip from Nealin Parker in USA Today this week, I...
Nov 11, 20222 min read
Less reactive = more productive.
“Our brains are most productive when there is no demand that they be reactive.” A mentor of mine, psychologist Sherry Turkle, made that...
Oct 27, 20222 min read
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